Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Stupid stupid boys

yeah, the tittle kinda gives it away. So lets start from the begining. I'm 14, he's 17. I'm in UT he's in NM. already bad, right? Well it gets worse. So we've been friends for 6 or 7 years, and last time I saw him (over winter break) I may have fallen for him a liitle (that is, if you make a little completly...) Then he goes back home after two weeks. And the most wonderful (not) thing happens: He tells me he's gay.
now don't get me wrong, I've got nothing against gays. The fact that he's my friend is not changing just because of his sexual preference. it's just that, like I said before, I'd fallen in love.
So I break down. I'm crying and all that shit but I manage to tell him that I had feelings for him.
We're really good friends and I knew that it wouldn't kill our relationship if I did, but then he told me (drumroll everybody!) He might like me back too. And now he was confused. And I felt like shit.
then I go off to Costa Rica for three weeks with only limited access to the internet. I come back and pretty much the day after, we break up. Or, as close to breaking up as we can get because we were never actually together. We decide to move on. He gets along right away, flirting with his friend Kyle but me? Thats only one of the reasons I hate the school I go too. Tiny private school with absolutely no cute boys that are in my league.
could my life get worse? No. I'm already fighting with my parents constantly and I have no friends in my class. All the real ones moved away. My dog is old and sick and I'm really scared for him. My sister comes back tomorrow which just means more fighting in my already hostile household.
Yeah. Life is *wonderful*.

So if you have any questions or anything you want to hear more about you can ask in the comments or something... I dunno how this normaly goes =]
THANKS! ~ittyK