Friday, November 12, 2010

I miss you...

I wish I hadn't fucked everything up.
I still love you.
Do you still love me?
I know you did.
I hate myself for doubting you.
I wish I coul dhave you back again.
Did you really mean what you said?
Are you really going to try to make things better?
Please do it?
Please help me?
I can't go on without you.
You were everything
Then you were gone.
What did I do?
What can I do?
I miss you.
I wanted to hurt you like this for so long
now I can't stand it.
Am I even hurting you?
I hope I'm not.
Please tell me I'm not?
Not that you tell me anything anymore.
It's been one month since we last spoke.
But you're gone.
Is there any chance of you coming back?
Please say there is.
Please...

I'm crying now.
Because I hurt you.
I said all those things.
Don't you know I didn't mean it?
Don't you know I was just pissed off?
It wasn't at you, though. It never was.
You were just there.
It was easy for me to take it out on you.
It always has been.
But if you came back I swear to god
I will never hurt you again
I will never lie to you again
I will never say those things again
I swear to god I won't!

Please believe me?
Please come back?
I fucking miss you.
Will you realize this is for you?
Or will you think it's just another one of my love-struck ramblings about him?
It's not.
It's for you, my dear.
Because I love you more than him.
I always have.
I always will.

You should just know that you're amazing.
You should know that I can't live without you.
You should know that everything I said that day was a lie.
You should know I never felt that way.

once you told me "without you, my life would be so much worse. You are one of my best friends and should anything like that happen to you I may not be able to go on"
Can't that still be true?
I miss being a part of you.
I miss talking to you everyday.
I miss having you a part of my life.

I miss you.
I miss you so much.
It hurts so badly.
I can't stop crying.

Why?

I love you.
I always have.
I always will.
I promise.

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